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I've Already Told Them

Oct 11, 2026
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Edge of Possibilities Coaching · Speaking · The Leadership Mirror · Contact
 
Liz Murray in her garden with her first roses of the season
In the garden with my first roses of the season
Hi {{ first_name | default: "there" }},
I've just come in from the garden. My first roses of the season are out, and I couldn't walk past without stopping to smell them.

“I've already told them.” I hear it from leaders all the time, usually about a conversation they've already had three or four times. I've said it myself. I once spent three months dropping hints to a team member before I thought to ask them a single question.

This week I share that story, and Graham's. He kept calling me on his drive home about the same two managers. Both conversations finally moved once we started asking.
?
REFLECTION QUESTION
“What's the conversation you keep having?”
★
THIS WEEK'S TIP
Before you have that conversation again, book the time and open with a question.
”
QUOTE I'M SITTING WITH
“Telling is Parent mode. Asking is Adult mode.”
Liz Murray
This week, from me to you
▶
Watch Take 5 With Me
How to stop having the same conversation with your team
Five minutes on why telling keeps the conversation going round.
Watch the video →
B
Read Beyond Boundaries Blog
Why the same conversation keeps coming back
My three months of dropping hints, and what finally shifted it.
Read the blog →
P
Listen Leading From The Edge Podcast
Why the same conversation keeps coming back
The audio version, for the drive home.
Listen now →
The Leadership Mirror
If you want to see which pattern is driving yours, the Leadership Mirror looks at four areas of how you lead under pressure and shows you where your authority is quietly slipping. It takes about five minutes, and it's free.
Take the Leadership Mirror →
Liz xx
Edge of Possibilities
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Edge of Possibilities · Leadership & Executive Coaching, Mentoring, Training
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